Always On, But Not Really There – Why Cell Phones Incarcerate and How to Break Free
December 21, 2009
Cell phones are marvelous devices. They can unleash you from the harness of your land line, offer endless entertainment to cranky kids in the backseat and help track criminals who stupidly use a mobile phone to call home. The irony of the term cell phone itself is inescapable. Some days I too feel entrapped by my mobile like an inmate in a cell. If you feel incarcerated by yours, join the club. While the US has been slower to catch on to mobile device usage than, say, Asia, we are not far behind in the effects these devices have had on us.
With the invention of long-distance communications such as the telegraph, the telephone, satellite and even mobile phones, we have been able to connect the world with a few taps on a keypad. We can find each other at a crowded concert or call in case we get stuck alongside the road. The downside is we are always on or, at the very least, always available. For the non-criminals among us, it’s not always helpful to be that accessible.
Curious about the phenomenon of instant availability, I sat down for a Skype chat with Naomi Baron, American University professor of linguistics and author of the aptly titled book, Always On: Language in an Online and Mobile World. While her book centers mostly around the evolution of language in the Digital Age, her most recent research points to the tenor of people’s thoughts around today’s mobile usage.
And it is surprising.
When asked to associate three words with the term mobile phone, the 18-24 age group Naomi surveyed said things like “annoying,” “addicted,” and “bondage”. When asked what they liked most and what they liked least about mobile phones, the number one answer was the same: contact. What they liked most was being able to call out if they wished (active). What they liked least was being the recipient of an unexpected call (reactive).
It takes two to text. But that is beside the point.
“People are feeling trapped by these devices,” Naomi relayed to me. Maybe being always on isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Whether in Sweden, Japan or Italy, Naomi found people to have a specific etiquette around mobile phone usage. It is considered rude to talk or even text in a movie theater in Sweden. Not surprisingly, Japan had the most uniform, formal etiquette. On the train, for instance, you are not to use it at all. Even text messaging is seen as disruptive. If someone does take a call, it is usually a business man who is then excused because, well, it was business. But things are changing. In 2001, 49% of those surveyed in Japan felt it was not okay to speak on their mobile phone on the street. By May 2008, Naomi found over 73% of those 18 to 24 years old said it was always or usual acceptable to do so.
In Sweden it is considered rude not to respond to a text message so many people feel obliged to text back within an hour. One Italian man revealed his strategy for dealing with the Always On phenomenon. “I put [my mobile phone] in a lead box to avoid being traced (so it does not signal that it is off, but not reachable).”
One American male revealed he is “too dependent” upon his mobile phone sometimes. An Italian female admitted she was much more tranquil when her cell phone was either broken or lost.
As we have seen, people have an ambivalent relationship with their mobile devices. We like the control, but prefer not to have to react to unwanted communication. In fact, as one Japanese person states, “Communication through [text messaging can] trick people’s minds as if they were engaged in real communication.” Texting a few jumbled phrases is not the same as having a face-to-face chat with a friend.
So how we can stop the madness of instant, unwanted availability and engage in the power of slow?
Create mobile-free zones. Seal your cell in the trunk of your car. Turn it off at meal times. Unplug for sixty minute increments. And, if you really have to, get a lead box like the Italian man in the survey. Regain the sense of control that instant communication once gave you so that you move towards a sometimes on, sometimes off, but always mindful life.
The Invisible Auxiliary Benefits of Slow
December 6, 2009
We all know the feeling of impatience when things take longer than they ‘should’. We tap our fingers, pace the floor, or shout unkind words in our heads or at the windshield, depending on the proximity of others or the level of their so-called offensive slowness.
But I ask you, what are we rushing toward? Why does the ‘is’ upset us so drastically? Because it often is not in alignment with our own personal ‘should’.
I was talking to a friend about some recent changes that were made after our server got updated. It took our six-person team about a week to adjust to the new system. Emails were ‘slower than usual’ and sometimes bounce-backs occurred (I remember when a bounce-back referred more to an immediate relationship after ending a long-term one. Being on the rebound meant you could bounce back to normal only after the fling had ended…)
“You know, Christine,” my friend sagely pondered outloud. “Maybe our Emails are supposed to take a little longer. I mean really ~ isn’t there power in slow? I, for one, still own a rake. I’d rather plod along my yard to the scratching noise it makes than zip around, emitting sound and CO2 with a leaf blower.” Not to mention the fresh air and exercise. Moving at the speed of a rake sounds good to me.
Oftentimes we think there is no benefit to doing things slower. We tend to believe doing things faster is somehow better. But what about the auxiliary effects of going slowly?
- Walking to the store instead of driving (exercise, light exposure, green, meditative)
- Raking your yard instead of leaf-blowing it (exercise, light exposure, green, meditative)
- Taking time to provide a thoughtful answer to an Email (you may remember to include more things, thereby reducing Email traffic considerably)
- Managing expectations ahead of time (reduces upset, especially around the holidays)
If you doubt the power of this, try walking just one pace slower today. Notice how you feel as you bring yourself to move at a slower speed. Do you feel impatient and anxious? Or do you feel yourself opening up to new possibilities and ways of thinking? Along the path, toss a few ‘shoulds’ in the drink. Then tell me how it went!
Time-Saver for Less Surfing
May 6, 2009
I am no technophobe. In fact, I celebrate the revolutionary tool called the Internet. It has improved my quality of life in many ways, allowing me to pursue my life’s dream of writing and connecting with people all over the world from the comfort of my home PC. It has allowed me to raise my kids while raising my awareness. All in all, the Web is a cool thing.
Admittedly, however, it can be a vacuous, time-sucking space. Much like television, the Internet is a 24/7 affair. Just the other day, my sister called me to ask how to use PayPal.
“Oh the Internet!” she moaned. I agreed with her. Things change there in the speed of a tweet.
So I was thrilled to find out about RosieKnows.com, a new Web portal that offers video tutorials on over 200 of the Web’s most popular sites. From PayPal to Couponclippers.com, Rosie goes through these sites step-by-step in video format.
It is a quick reference guide for those things you don’t want to ask your sullen teen about. And it will save you time so you can spend more of it with that sullen teen who just wants your attention even as she says she does not!